Free Time? Whaaaa???

What do you do when you find yourself suddenly baby-less, with totally free time on your hands?

My mom took the little one out for FIVE hours the other day. That's right, five whole hours with no baby. I found myself suddenly unable to remember what one does when they don't have a child to take care of. Just what did I do, before becoming a mother?

*sits back and waits for answer*

Yeah. I don't even know.

So I went and got coffee, and sat outside the coffee shop, attempting to read a novel that I have been awaiting for-freaking-ever (An Echo In The Bone by Diana Gabaldon). Anyone who reads these books knows that getting another book in this series is complete and total bliss (akin to multiple orgasms...no joke). But I found that my mommy brain can't even comprehend it. Reading this story is like meeting up with old friends, such is the depth of love you feel for these characters. I know the stories behind their scars (emotional and physical), know their quirks and subtleties of communication and posture and facial expressions and...sigh. This is what MAKES good writing, and my brain can no longer wrap around it all.

Gone, are the days where reading was leisure and as easy as breathing. Now it takes every ounce of concentration to get through a few pages and then...what the hell is going on? Jump back a page...then another...was I even paying attention while I was reading this? No, I was not. I was thinking about what my son is up to, and how he's doing without his mommy. Well...fuck.

So I sat there in the sun, sipping coffee and listening to the chatter of the people around me. Behind me sat two women and one very grungy looking man (very likely my age, plus or minus a year or two). I tuned in for a second to hear one of these ladies explaining her (self proclaimed) "deep" thoughts on how "like, the world is like, beautiful, and like...how often do I just look around and notice the sky and the trees...like, this is what people who are in prison are missing every day."
This is the point at which I realized...either this mommy thing has aged me, or...bitches be stupid these days.
Same woman started whining about her lack of time to do things like make things out of the beads she bought...what with her couple of college classes and all. Since I had been there for about 40min or so, and they had been there when I arrived, I found this highly unlikely, and had half a mind to turn around and tell her that her "lack of time" was entirely imagined. But before my eyes could fall out from rolling, I just decided it was best that I leave.

I came home, wandered from room to room a bit, knowing full well that I could be doing any number of productive things. God knows the dishes won't do themselves, and I've been dying to get my clothes organized since the day I realized I can actually wear most of them again. But I snuggled my cat for the first time in months, turned on a movie, and lounged. It was glorious.

Only when my mom got home with a very hungry baby did I remember that I was supposed to eat something. *shrug* Oh well.

I will someday remember how to do this free time thing again. Er..I hope.